Precog!

I did not slept well last night. I have a precognition, sort of subconscious dream that i talked to myself. Reflecting on the low level brain activities before i went into deep sleep. I do have these sort of dreams oftenly. But this one is particularly powerful.

I was watching a DVD before i went to bed at midnight. I proceed then to listen to my favourite hard house music for a while before i went to sleep. It was very nice. I am energize by it! Unsurprisingly for me.

My precog is about what i want to do with my life. I have a dream and i know what i wanted to do with my passion in life. I love to be in entertainment business. I crave for these culture. I know i wanted to own some club, cafes, bars and restaurant some day.

The feeling of happiness being able to bring people together for some nice meal, nice drinks and nice cocktails at the bars. Listening to some house, hip hop or jazz music. Bringing some bands and deejays around the world to play at the club. Having a good time together with friends and people. Chilling out. I am energize by these things. Funny but true. Its what i wanted and its what that drives me.

I never get bored by these things. I am passionate about it and thats what i wanted to do.

Its just that during that precog, i asked myself, how far away am i from my dream? Am i still able to achieve my own dream and passion? Some people lives their lifes that way. Fucking cool! Some naysayers might say,"please wake up from your dream!" while some supporters says,"its cool, your dream is, go on! Make it happen!"

I wanted to live it. I am a realist cum idealist. I know that dreams makes me feel alive. Unlike zombies you see everyday walking in their blue white collar suit with their ties walking at 8am shoveling into the doors of MRT or the closing lifts of the office building. They are bored and they are zombies living their lifes routinely boringly everyday. Knowingly they have a dream but gave it up long long time ago in exchange for their time, salary and comfort of life.

Go watch the movie Fight Club. It explains there. They quoted, we are victims and slaves of consumerism. Its true you know. Seeing an average humans being locked up in their own mind and slaves to their daily routines and responsibilities. Its just plainly boring and lifeless. Its death.

I remembered a scene from the movie The Fast and Furious; Tokyo Drift. This guy, Han, points to the crowds of people crossing the road, why are they living their lifes following the rules? They are letting fear lead them.

Its true you know. Seeing all these unconscious people running their daily lifes exchanging their most precious time for money and responsibilities. We are becoming more robotic and zombie every single day of passing in our life.

I need to sit down and reflect and make some drastic change in my life. To my action to achieve my goals and dreams of my life. I wanted to have these things in my life!

To end this, i quote Fight Club, we are trapped in consumerism. We buys IKEA fitting in our apartment. Which, is why, i ended up on the weekend having that Swedish lunch in Shanghai. Eating meatball and their tasty roasted refillable hot coffee!



Out!

Shitty Times

On my personal note today, i've just realised that i've over used my funds and cashs this 2 months. I've drained my cash and i "know" that i've over used and i shouldn't. The beauty of Shanghai and shopping. >_<

Its the realisation that the economy is not getting any better and i am not making 5 figures USD income that makes me having a cold sweat and sweaty palms. Its the negative feelings. Its the truth and its an unescapable fact that money is gold and rare, which makes them harder to find more than usual, especially in this freaking time now.

To break down my cold sweat, i've just realised that i still have some debts to be paid and i need to save more for future purposes. There ARE plentiful that need to spend, including rents and basic necessities, plus with the fact further more that more than ever, that i need to be the person and the man to give more to the family. The breakdown of the thought of it makes me tremble and have this uncontrollable fear of being poor and broke.

I hate that fucking feeling of no $$$, i need to find ways to increase my wealth. I need to overcome my fear of no $$$, but is there any methods to overcome this fear? I afraid not. I need to sacrifice my lifestyle more now, for the better, in order to have more cash in my freaking bank account, after i've pay my dues (my debts) with the company and to the person that i owe to.

Lifes shitty at time, ain' it?

>_<

Zap.... .... ....

................. ................. .................... .........................

I am lost for words now. I am blank. I felt disturbed.

The whole damn world is in calamity now. Everyday what you read in news is all about natural disaster. Flooding in the southern China, typhoon in Phillipines, farry sank killing 700 in Phillipines, flooding in United States and those aftermath of quake in Sichuan in China, cyclone hitting Myanmar and much more.

I think the earth hates us so much now. As a population. Killing her softly perhaps over the ages throughout the history of man. -_-

Business and economics is at very low as well. Oil prices at sky high, American going to attack Iran, America housing market at their lowest, US dollars dropping like crazy, average Malaysian going down hard and etc blah blah blah.

Too much bad news. All negativity around me.

I think i will go into meditate mode now and try to stay positive. Or perhaps forget everything that makes us feeling like shit. Maybe what we need right now, as an average citizens of the world is to solve some of the things THAT we need to make the future livable for out next generation.

>_<

p.s. maybe Malaysia is going to snow soon. Why not? We had tsunami and earthquake before. -_-

Fitness and Me

I am lost for words and i am idealess now. Perhaps, i am drained of inspiration to write something nice and fun, which is not me btw, or simply i need to recharge myself by making me having fun again. Full of life and vigours, the essense of the inner self, within me. Haha.

I've been hitting the gym recently and i am glad. I felt great although i have been hit by the stupid weather (raining for the pass 5 days, drizzling and raining, non-stop) ensuring me having the stupid headache. Arghhh..... !1!1!1!!!!! But, overall, it felt good and i am very, very determine (and i meant it), very determine to lost 10% of my weight and build some muscles. In short, looking good physically! LoL!

My regime is simple but of course, it will not be easy. What i need is to focus focus focus and focus on my goals. The picture that i imagine within my head of what i want to be. A relentless pursue of my dreams and goals, of my physical self 3 months down the road. Let me break down my goals to ya (i believe that anyone should state their goals and voice it out to make it a statement to make it happen):

1. Control my diet
Meaning watch what i put in my mouth. Less carbo, less rice, more fruits and less supper! Easier said than done, but of course, every weekend i'll splurge myself on some nice tasty delicious food. Only on weekends.

2. Go for cardio
Hit the treadmill, that spinning class, that bike and blah blah, for 60 minutes every time i hit the gym (which is 3-4 times/week). A combination of walking, jogging and hitting that max heart beating zone of running for a minute, while having a blast of music at both my ears!

3. Go for Strength
Hit that resistance machine with the combination of free weight. Pre-planned of upperbody workout for one day followed by abs and legs workout the next following gym day. Of course, my current focus would be on losing weight 1st rather than to build that freaking muscle mass up. Hence, the need to do like 3 sets of 20 repetitions pumping an area of muscle, eg biceps.

4. Walk more
I mean, its a norm here to walk and walk, as compared to what our lifestyle and our climate in Malaysia. Its a norm for us to walk 30 minutes in here, or even cycle to anywhere in the city. Weather is good, and you see everyone anywhere walking and cycling in China. Its healthy and its good. It is proven, that, if you walk and cut down on the food and carbo intake everyday, trust me, you will see a huge difference at your waistline. I've tried it and its proven!

5. FOCUS
This is the most important issue IMHO. I mean, i've seen and tried countless times, that an average person that hits the gym have the hardest time maintaining that consistency. Everyone loses their focus and gives up too easily. They give reasons and excuses to themselves. Its part of the bringing up, i supposed. I've learned that and i am not going to repeat that mistake again. Its a commitment i gave myself. I have not yet to have physical strength yet, thus, i need to make it up for by having an unwavering of a solid mental strength to compensate for it now.

In general, they are 2 types of strength in athletes, physical strength and mental strength IMHO. Physical strength is those that what we see in athletes, running that mile under 6 minutes? I mean, those that can jog and run and jog with that stamina, endurance and strength that you just wish for, anyway. Mental strength is those athletes that you see, that they have those goals and focus in their mind that wouldn't give up. They have absolute unwavering positive mindset within them to accomplish their goals. They don't even know how losing is. Its just not in their mind, the word of losing. Someone like Lance Armstrong, the winner of Le Tour de France for 7 seasons in a row.

Hence, i understood this, that i need to accept the fact and truth. I ain't gonna run away from it anymore not give myself reasons and excuses blinding me and myself. I am accepting the fact. The fact that i am overweight. And the fact that i need to change it and it is not going to b easy. It is going to be tiring and it is hard. I have accepted the fact that i need to sacrifice something within me, to change my results. I believe that i can do it and i am doing it. Simple but not easy. Change in action = Change in results.

I live by the words, you only live once. Why not make something happen out of it? Its your life anyway. What happen at the end, is what you are doing now. Its just that simple. Hence, i am going to make something happen. I am going to change. I am picturing myself 6 months down the road having that good image of myself looking good in the mirror. I felt great and i felt positive.

Looking forward and see myself in 3 months!

:)

Gambateh!

Random: Check out the Blogs!

I have 2 things i wanna write today. 2 very contrasting sites that i read recently. Both sites touches my inner self. One site touches my feeling of anger and feeling frustrated as hell. Knowing about the current situation in my country. Its ridiculous. Go read it more and understand the real story that happens in Malaysia.

The story about a devastated mother, who is a teacher by profession, and her daughter in Malaysia. Heart touching story!

I am feeling pitiful for them. Maybe we can write something up and make this a bigger story to create an issue for the ministers in charge, so that they can do something about it. >_<


-------------


On the other hand, i visited this blog about food that i've been drooling like hell over in China. Please please. I am freaking hungry and freaking drooling seeing these foods pictures and makes me wanna go over there and taste all the heavenly good delicious food as soon as possible.

Thats what i says last time. What do i felt about Malaysia?

3F = Family, Friends and FOODS!

Check out the blog at here, 3 meals day.

I am going to drool the whole day!

>_<

Typical Day in Office!

Here i am reporting our daily office routine life, and its more than routine to be exact. Its called freaking shitty boring bored routine everyday. We reached office at 8am sharp through our dear little smelly company bus, practically dragging everyone's ass, including mine, to wake up, at that particularly ungodly hour in the morning. Sun's shining up the arse and you wish that you could just rollover the blanket and hide under the comfort of the bed! Such a nice comfy feeling!

Of course, we start the day right by working hard! Hahahaha and bla bla bla. Reach 11 am, and its lunch time! Woooooohoooooo.... .... .... .... My Ass!

Welcome to the nightmare of our daily life! The nightmare at lunch during weekdays and it happens during the afternoon. -_- Just imagine the food that is too salty, too oily, too plain, tasteless, cold served with white rice that you need chilli accompanied in each scoop swallowing, opps, shovelling it down the throat. Get what i mean? No you don't! You are enjoying those good little food everyday at lunch!

*Hence the need for us to enjoy McDonald sometimes at lunch and weekend food fiesta at Shanghai and other places*

See his face to understand the whole freaaaaaaaaaaaaking sad feeling we have at canteen daily. Extra information for your understanding. The freaking contract for the lunch *awful* vendor is not that particularly cheap. It cost RMB7.50 for each person. Its like RM3.50 per person which you can have a decent mix economy rice at KL. Better at Setapak, IMHO. Of course, with all the increase in price for raw food and inflation that goes up to the heaven. What do we expect? >_<

Plus, of course, our daily routine smoking session at guard house that is within walking distance of 5 minutes from office. Here is our small little gathering and meetings + gossiping that happens daily at lunch time. Cool huh! Hahahaha.

Maybe you can share your lunch today then?

Disasters and Heroes

I am going to dedicate this post to those victims and survivors of the recent events. The aftermath of the mother nature. There results from the fury of her. I think and i believe humanity suffers from it and the goodness of humanity still exists afterall.

The 7.8 Richter scale of the earthquake that shakes the earth in Sichuan province, China and the lord of the storm, Cyclone Nargis, that sweeps in Myanmar. Devastating effect and a sad event. Thousands of lives are lost, scores of properties destroyed and all other effects comes soon after.

I shall mourn and be sad to what that has happen. I can put myself into the shoes of these people and imagine what that has happen and how did it happen, but i can never imagine and feel the sadness of the families of the people who suffers from it. It is unbearable and it is pain.

I shall continue not further discussion and imagining the pains of these, but rather look and admire the heroes of these events. The firefighters working their life off to helps those in need, the doctors working non-stop to saves those that can be save, the humanitarian who helps and assists the victims with compassion without any rewards and all other efforts by everyone to make something happen.

This i believe is the truly borderless globalization unity of all mankind. These shows that people, indeed afterall still cares and have a heart. I am moved by their action. I believe that these acts from these selfless person deserves a recognition and acknowledgement. Its no politics. Its just pure simple act of kindness from the heart.

I shall honour a minute of silence to those life that perished, for them that they have went to a better place after life. To the lord father for whatever their religion is.

May them be rest in peace.

Random on 10th April

I am feeling freaking plateau and funny right now. I am feeling stressful and very pressure from within. Seriously. The inner desire to release myself and to do what i love, to achieve, to get and acquire what i desire most. I feel and i seriously freakingly wanted to be better. I believe i can do it and i really wanted to do it. There is no single word that i can express what i am feeling right now.


I wanted a life of what i want! I wanted to be physically better, better looking, better image, more wealthy, more energy, more accomplishment, more satisfaction, more money, better career and owning shit load of business, properties and assets! I am coming and moving la! I am going to make my goals a reality!


I am aiming high for a better career achievement as well. Some might says, aim too high and falls faster, but but, i am a high achiever and a damn pretty high, i am sure. Sky high and sky's the limit? Aiming and gunning it down making it to happen. I will la, if not how to get another property to invest in and have 4 properties by 2010 *mid-term goal btw* Of course, the property must have a resell value, capital appreciation and positive cashflow as well not mentioning good and excellent location. As they saying goes, location location location.


But right now, to channel the energy to the right area, consider this, i am going to make my goals for 2008 comes true. I am going to be physically fit and make myself look better. Have a great body and better image. Perhaps more masculinity? Better abs and stronger arms? I have a goal and i am going to make it happen!


Which btw speaking, i am currently a super big listener for a few tunes; which are: Justin Timberlake - My Love, Lupe Fiasco - Hip Hop Save My Life, Ne-Yo - Because of You and Will.I.Am - I Got It From My Mama! Freaking cool and freaking nice. OMG! They now officially in The Krazybananaz Playlist Tunes of The Year!


Stay tune for further updates!

March 08 = Terrible Luck?

I surrender. March 2008 has been the most worst down fucked up month for me in my life! KNNCCBLMKSHTNM!

Unbelievable silly tough shit freaking fucking fucked up luckless month for me! *i hereby declare lost by hanging my white g-string on top of my head!* Unbelievable shit!

Here is the reasonS why:

1. I lost my beloved mobile (This happen when i was busy capturing and snapping pictures and i dropped it when i was putting it in my pocket) -_-

2. I lost my beloved mp3 player (It was dropped from my jacket pocket while my jacket was put on top of a chair) -_- -_-

3. I was 'sprayed with vomit by a muthafcuker who was drunk standing next to me' and 'washed by beer and long island tea by another guy next to me while dancing' (all of this MCCB happen within 1 hour) -_-

4. I practically lost $$$ from these events! *Shitty experience* (I believe every cent counts while trying to justify my expenses vs my income) Pisseeed Off!

5. I can't buy my VIEWTY for now yet due to the lacked of cash -_-

6. I can't make a tattoo yet due to the price of the tattoo that i wanted to make is out of my budget!

I think i am going to hibernate at home and try to refresh my memory of the fucking shitty luck i have this March! Fcuker.... KNNMCCB!


-_-

KNNCCBLMKSHTNM = Kanineichaocibailohmaikaisohaitiuniama

Lost, Loster, Lostest!

I am lost for words during the weekend. I felt plateau. Feel empty and felt up and down yet lack of a thorough definition of how exactly i should be feeling at the time. Its funny recalling and thinking how this shit could happen at 1 time. Maybe its pure "lucky". How can it be not lucky? You tell me.

I lost my beloved Mp3 Player on Friday. Dropped from my winter jacket in the club. It was not the most expensive nor the most classiest possession that i have. Its just that its my 1st and i am emotionally attached to the freaking little black device. I listen to it everywhere i go, everywhere i went, from smoking at the bus stop waiting for the morning bus, from the trip to Shanghai at weekend and back, at Shanghai waiting for subway to come ignoring the other living existance around me, at the table eating alone or during the food session and so much more. I am blank. I felt plateau. I was actually in fact devastated.









Then comes Saturday. I walk around Shanghai and browsing some Mp3/Mp4 player. iPOD and Sony Walkman to be exact. I was trying to find a price and make a budget for it.

Then the unexpected happen. I lost my beloved Sony Cybershot phone that i am so use to it to capture the spur of moment and the aura of happiness in me. I drop it in a club again. OMG! I was like. How can the same shit happen to a same guy twice, in a weekend? You found one.









I am speechless. I am awed.


Truthfully, i am lost for words. I lost some of the phone and contact numbers that i have accumulated over the last 6 months. Lucky for me, i kept my old-can't-die-on-me-and-no-one-want-that-K600i-also phone in my drawer fully charged with my old DIGI simcard. I managed to get back a new simcard without any charges. I slot it in and there i was. Back to square 1 using the old-can't-die-on-me-and-no-one-want-that-K600i-also phone. Nice hor~~


-_-



Literally speechless.

P.S: I am now aiming higher for professional level camera phone. Notice the word i use. Camera phone. NOT phone with camera!

VIEWTY here i come.









How to NOT like it. Freaking fantastically superbly designed. Infact, it look more like a camera with 5.0 mpixel, comes with professional lens namely Schneider Kreuznach, and it had it all. I swear to you, that this cute little damn thing is making me sweating profusely everytime i look at the ads here. Freakingly fantastic.









It boasts a 3" LCD touch screen capability. It has professional xenon flash light to capture that moment in dark. It has a ISO 800 capability although from the review, the picture has some noises around it, making it less perfect. It has image stabiliser for some active and fast picture capturing. At least. It can take video at 120fps making video presentation looking exceptionally fantastic for slow mo action. My God!

All of this in a small sleek classy device. It even has a touch screen QWERTY pad during sms typing. Can you believe it? Freakin awesome!



Albert Einstein once quoted, "Imagination is more important than knowledge."



Go check it out. Go dream!

Back Home!

Reach Changi Airport on Wednesday night, touching down on the runway at approximately 7.30pm. Sky is still dim, with sun shining half at the horizon. I was anxious and i felt good and felt happy in the same time. I was back to the familiar places that i can recognised. English words is everywhere. I felt like home. The feeling of long lost into a different place and being able to enjoy out local cuisine, Char Keoy Toew and Mee Rebus with Kopi ice and Teh ice after. Wah! Its the super ultimate-mind blowing meal for me since 2 months ago. Felt fantastic!

Stay overnight in SG due to exhaustion over a whole day deal, flight time from the morning to the night time. Feel tired a little but still happy after seeing familiar faces all around. Reload my Singtel and exchange all the sim card with my 2 mobiles. Apparently, my China Mobile does not have internation roaming like what other telco offers in MY and SG. I think i have to subsribe to international roaming before i leave next time. What the heck! I thought it is all automatic in these age of IT and internet and wireless communications.

Wake up early in the morning in SG, take a short bath and make myself comfy at the hotel room before proceed to buy a Straits Times and have my fav Kopi Ice and toasted bread at a chinese kopitiam nearby. There and then, getting ready to go back to Malaysia, while reading newspaper and holding a cigarette at the tip of my hand.

I've forgotten 2 things since been away for 2 months, no smoking at a non-designated area outside the yellow box even at a open air kopitiam and you do have to order yourself over the counter especially in the daylight. Not all the places but some kopitiams along the old areas such as food court as well.

Back to hotel, clean up a bit, repack to check and confirm to see if there is anything missing. Done and check out morning at 10am. By the time i've reach to KL at Times Square, its almost 5pm and being able to see my darling and Romeo after such a long time is really indeed a blessing. *Smiles*...

My heart really soft and i'm happy to see them after a long time. Will further update when i have the time. Shortage of time apparently.

Apologetic

I think i am soft by nature. I am a person who is willing to bend, who can accomodate, a person who listens passionately and i am not that hard macho type of person. I am a people's person and an a weako who like to makes people happy. As long as they enjoy my accompanion, i am more than willing to slot in and make their day. I enjoy and likes seeing people smile, guys or ladies, colleagues or friends, seeing them being able to enjoy and smiles really makes my day.

Today, this morning, i was a little bit angry and harsh on someone i know. I miscommunicated and we talks on different wave length, maybe its just that i am a guy and we are not that intuitive nor receptive towards the common language spoken my the females. I was angry, but after a while, after cooling off, i believe that it is not worth to be angry and ruin our day. I wish to apologize and i do sincerely hope that everything is cool. Friends are meant so share their joy and their sorrow if they wish to. I am able to put my ego down and just erase the whatsoever bad memories that have happen. Its better that way, i believe, being able to be happy is a good blessing that not alot of people can have. Happiness it seems, auraed from from inner self and i will maintain and keep it that way.

How does you react when you encounter this kinda of situation? A situation of misunderstanding that will brings conflict and negativity and sadness. I wish that you can put down your ego, let your face down and just open with it. It will bring you joy and happiness. Believe me, i know it can bring me happiness, and so can you.


Cheers!

Tormentation of Pain

I am confused. I am lost and i dunno what to do. I have lost faith and lost my direction. I am feeling like a little boy lost in the streets with all eyes looking everywhere else except me. People just walks by ignoring each other and do not even give a shit about anything else anymore. What do you do when you reach this situation and this crappy times?

There's nothing much i can do right now but to get myself out of this shit hole i've dig for myself for the last couple of years. 5 years to be exact. Sometimes, the stress is unbelievable and it just keep on piling on me and onto my chest making me dizzy and having a hard time to breathe. Sleep is a no-no when it comes to that time. Your brains and chest just goes haywire and everything seems negative. Destructive it seems and it does.

What do you do when u face unbearable stress and unhappiness? Do you run away from it all, do you face it and solve the problem logically like a man or do you just sit down at your couch facing the TV holding a bottle of beer looking like a zombie? I don't know. It maybe seems that i am running away from my problems, but i believe that i am facing it and making a huge sacrifice as the pillar of strength of the family. Being away from your family and son when they are so young and infant, for me, is a huge sacrifice. I'm having a difficult times ahead and i am currently. Maybe its payback after years of comfortable living. I don't know. I am lost.

Perhaps someone kind enough could share some of my grief and my burdens right now. I am feeling down. I don't know what else whould i do. The only thing that is consoling me right now, is by listening to songs, that touch my heart by its catchy tunes. I am sad. Perhaps tomorrow will be a better day. I am looking forward to it. Please, Please, Please stop tormenting me.

Fuck it all. I shall be strong and i am determine to do that. I am going to bounced back even stronger after this.

Yes! I am going to be!

Choose to be Happy!

Todays Wednesday and i'm really feeling up and down, somes feeling plateau, and i dunno what i should be feeling. The only consolation is to remember them, my family from the wonderful memories when we are together all the time, being apart really have a big impact on families. Remembering my little cute Romeo and my darling, whom send me an SMS this morning saying things that i felt badly about. Why the fuck that i am in this fucking situation. Hell knows. All fuckup and all goes haywire! Really feeling bullshit now!

I really want to forget about all the unhappy memories and move on from there. At least, i can and be able to concentrate on my job in hand and make my money for my family and for all the debt and the mistakes done last time. Really a bomb and feeling the heavy of stress lying on top both of my shoulders.

Why does the world have to be this way? The truth and the world is a bad place. A place whereby if you are not ready for it, it will just crush you mentally and emotionally without giving a shit about your feelings and your situation. People i know, lots of them are in this fucking kinda world and fucking situation. Unless you are born into the world of golden spoon, things might turned out better for you. Might be worst with all the world looking at you to fall. Fucking world!

And the least i can do for myself is to listen to my fav tunes and forget all about it and just be strong and iron-willed. I need to be strong and i have forgotten what i wrote just now. Memories erased and i've moved on. Better to feel happier and enjoy my time rather than to collapsed into devastation and negativeness of this world. At least, i will feel better and be happy. Thats the way i think everyone should live their life, full with happiness and enjoyment with the inner being feeling satisfied. At least you will not regretting living your life.

Thus, i always tell people when they felt sad or feeling down, they are people whose situation is worst then us, for instant people in Iraq, people living in between the feud of Isreal and Palestinian and etc. We can choose to be happier or choose to be sad. At least we have a choice!

I currently i choose to be happy. I hope you choose to be happy as well. God Bless!

Day Before Weekend

For the last few days, i was having some sort of throat problem. It is pain and it is sour at the top of my throat between my inner nose and my upper throat. Dunno how it happens and it is definitely not comfortable. I think it is most probably due to few reasons why my throat is feeling dry and itchy.

Maybe it is due to the cold and dry aircon to blows directly at my face when i sleep soundly. Maybe it is due to the inhaling the smokes of the local ciggies that is dryer and not as moist as our local and SG ciggies. Lots and several reasons that might have happened. I just hope that it is not for long. Can't stand the feeling of burning and itchiness and dryness at the back of your neck I bought some throat smoothing candies yesterday, Halls, and hopefully it will helps. Yeah! Hopefully...

Today is Friday and its a day to weekend. Thank god! At least got to rest at home and do my home and personal stuff. I have to do my laundry and do my ironing. Stacks of cloths have to be iron. Bathrooms to be wash and floors to be mopped and to be clean. Maybe i am hoping that when my friend comes back from M'sia, he will do it for us! Haha!

Wednesday's badminton session was exhausting and tiring. My legs was dead tired. Can't move around and feels sour as well. But nevertheless, it was fun and it is sweaty. Some of them continue with a session of volleyball and basketball. But i was dead tired. Maybe due to the lack of sleep and lack of appropriate rest. Haha!

I finally saw Romeo just now after more than 1 month. He's getting thinner and taller now. Going to a big boy and big guy soon. I just hope that time will slow down and let me enjoy every single moment of it while seeing my Romeo to grow. Just miss him so much and makes my heart soften. But i am strong and i am iron-willed. ;)

What do you do this coming weekend? Let loose, stay home, rest and relax, sporty sweaty sports day or even clubbers night? Plentiful of things can do. I plan to clean my house and maybe just enjoy myself by strolling at the walking street in the city center as the weather is nice. Nice windy during the night and not that hot summer night.

Whatever you do, may you have fun and live your life and spend your time with no regrets! Enjoy!

Coffee Lounge

Here i am taking a break from my routine and my hiatus, surfing for blogs as my mind wanders around thinking about plans for tonight. Work is busy and somehow routinic. Bored you might say, hence the need to a ciggy during urinal breaks. Wonderful pleasure and satisfaction guaranteed and the only thing that is missing is a partner at crime to sneak out and smoke at our pleasure.

I am now listening to Hed Kandi as usual when i am typing this blog. My friend from Phillipines just now intrude me and ask me whether i'm available tonight to have a cuppa of coffee at a nice lounge we found out recently. Nice place, i added and nice venue to hang out and to smoke as well. Our plan is to go out in a gang of few person to this coffee lounge and chill out after we have our scrumptous dinner. If it is a nice plan, why not? Chill out and listens to some nice tunes and relax. Ultimate way to relax and release my stress!

Some people like to drink liquor, some like to shop, some like to eat, i prefer to eat ice-cream and a bitter glass of large ice coffee with no sugar. Makes my day goes alive. I just prefer and like the aroma of the richly taste coffee beans. Due to that, i seldom drink any mochas as they taste chocolaty and sweet. Triple shot espresso sounds like my cuppa of coffee.

I've been to this coffee lounge before and i like the environment in there. Nice cozy place, expensively assembled decor with nice wooden color sofas, cute cozy lights and splits into 3 levels. Extremely nice and the best i have been so far in ZJG, China. The toilet itself is also nice decorated and renovated. Polished tiles, nice standout basins and nice smell, what else can you ask for? If they were to convert this lounge to a club, i think i'll like very much in there. The only next question remains is how much do they charge for entrance and for the drinks? *my mind wanders*

I heard from my friend, he just came back from TianJin, that he has been exploring the streets in TianJin the last weekend. The discos in TianJin does not charge any cover-charge for entrance. They only charge when you order any drinks from the bar. A bottle of beer cost him RMB35, which is less than SGD7 if you were to convert it. Just miss the disco time. Blinking lights, booze, ciggies and sweat. Such a nice mix!

Farker! Hate it on Monday!

Tantalizing Thursday

Today i'm tired and perhaps feeling sick and unwell. My legs and my thighs is tired and feels sour. You know the feeling of tiredness and hot around your legs that happen to you when you sick and have a fever. Little bit of sleepy as well. Too much badminton last night perhaps. Jumping around here and there for 2 hours in the stadium court. Plus some extra session with volleyball and basketball as well. How not to get tired? My legs is giving way even now i'm sitting at my place. Felt tiring but feels good as well. Being able to sweat it out at least once a week is vital to me now. Maybe it happens to me due to that i am weak and having air-con to blow at me after a sweaty session last night.

Currently, i'm listening to something softer. Mandarin songs to be exact, Jay Chou - Fa Ru Xue (Snow like hair). I just like a couple of his songs, melodic with soft tunes with a little touch of R n B to his tunes and songs. Although i have no idea what is he singing and the meaning of the lyrics of his songs. Perhaps i can learn a bit if i were to ask around for some translation. Just like his tunes and this song particular now. Feeling tired and unwell.

I was having a late dinner late night last night at a cafe outside my house. I was having a nice plate of curry chicken rice in a claypot serve with steamed egg, kangkung veggies and etc. Sipping my favourite ice coffee, served chilled with 2 ice cubes, taste bitterish and heavy aroma of coffee scent. Ermm oooo wahh! The nice smell of the java coffee beans that you would stop your actions and dos just for that moment of enjoyment. Heaven!

Same as the weather here as well. Yesterday is th 1st day of Autumn according to my friend here, perhaps Chinese calender, which i do not mind due to the soft wind blowing at you when you walk around. I was walking to this cafe and i stop my movement at 1 time during the walk. The sensation feeling of wind blowing across your body and your face with winds having to move your hair making me feel like heaven at one time. Such a lovely moment! I enjoy it and i love it even more if only i can hold my love 1 during that time. I hope the time will stop ticking at that moment itself. Such a fantastic soothing feeling being able to imagine you will be hugging your love one during tha good moment. Makes you remember and feel it for eternity. Heavenly!

I do hope tonight will be same again, with winds blowing at me and me imagining the happiness eternity moment together with my love 1. At least i am able to feel alive and full of positive love around me, even though the reality and truth maybe speaks otherwise. I want be to alive and full of love. It makes me soft and it makes me feels good. I wanted this feeling to be forever and for eternity.

This is for you my love :)

Roses are red, Violets are blue,
I love you so much and I love you forever too!


Muaks Muaks!


;) I am now feeling damm soft and vulnerable right at this moment now. Weeping at heart. Wish you were here and wish that you will understand what i am going through right now! ;)

Sad and Best Forgetten

I was a little bit sad and felt disappointed. Although i think from my head thats its logical and it make sense when you justified it, i still felt deep down in my heart that i deserved more. Haha. Small issue but was taken by surprised.

It is due to a certain claims which is not much, approximately RMB500, was not passed and rejected for a valid reason. It make sense if you were to think it properly and look at the bigger picture as advise by a wise man. So the moral of the story is that, look at the bright side always and look at the bigger picture. There are certain reasons why certain things cannot be done. It is not because it can't be done but rather not appropriate to be done. You know sometimes life sucks but there is nothing much you can do about it except to blog it and to rant it. And you get over it after that.

Life sucks! Move on!

What did i wrote just now? I forgot about it and seems that i have a shortage of memory these days. I can only remember sweet, good, meaningful, happy and delightful memories. Bad memories is nothing good except to be best forgotten. Haha! I'm going to enjoy the rest of my day and a good round of sweating of badminton later.

Sweat it out and smile it loud!

Hahahaha!

Good Day! Bad Day!

I am feeling a little bit of funny today. Dunno why, maybe too much going on at once until i can't be able to feel anything in particular or point my feeling to a specific individual event. Life is going plateau for me right now with a little bit of up and down for me. These couple of days have been my up i guess. Feeling enjoyable but yet felt regret to a certain extend.

I went to KTV, couple hours of badminton to sweat of any toxic out of my blood and been to feet massage. Yes, i do enjoy myself here but i am missing my family and Romeo as well. Feeling of enjoying myself and not having to see them and missing them and thinking about what they are doing makes me soft in my heart. Felt guilty in a way that makes me worry too.

Weathers have been kind to me for a couple of days, not tat particularly hot and humid, but enough to make me sweat walking around the town. At least i am not feeling hot and burning at my neck and shoulder after a session of jay-walking. Just some baby sweat! Haha.

One thing particularly i have to adjust to is the people here sleeps early. Shops starts to close at 9pm and by 10pm, you can really felt the emptiness of the streets even at the shopping district. Only certain cafes and restaurants opens beyond that hour and you definitely can felt the vast differences when 8pm and 10pm. When i am back in Singapore and Malaysia, certain places only starts to pack at 12am especially in discos in KL. Coffeebeans and Starbucks back home is still pack with people until wee hour in the morning especially weekend. Mamaks and cybercafes is even later. You still will be able to see people sipping their cup of teh halia and teh tarik at 2am. Quite bad i must say for body and healthiness.

Anyway, i am now started to adjust to the time here as well. I am going to adjourn to bed, and now is at 2am. Haha. Slight improvement i think compare to in Malaysia when i sleep oftenly after 1am. So take care all of your all and enjoy your weekend in whatever you might be doing.


Enjoy!

Miscommunication

I am a little bit feeling down today. Apparently i did make some bad remark or bad quote yesterday. I supposed that i offended the person and i felt that i did nothing wrong. Maybe its just that people are different and due to the difference in culture and understanding. They maybe offended, i supposed. I am not feeling good because of the response given to me, the feedback apparently is somehow grey. You know, the part that you think you are not totally wrong but not totally right.

So perhaps it is due to this, all the misunderstanding and miscommunications involved, that make all these bad feelings around. So, i hope that i can do something about it and make something worthwhile about it. I wish that things are much more simpler. You do not have to think in such a complex way, so complexity and so much worry and confusion. I prefer to keep things simple and easy. It that way, it makes me happier as a person.

What will you do if really things do go little bit of wrong and there is tension arise in the between of people. Do you proactive to find an amicable solution to make its feels better, or do you just keep it that way and sit on your ego hoping the other person apologize, or do you feels nothing at all and do nothing about it? Which individual are you?

I believe i'm the 1st one, the person that will find a way to make it better. The proactive one that will just try to make it corrected and makes the vibe alive again. I think it is the best way for me and i will feel much better about it. But, it takes 2 hands to clap. Hence, i'll need the other side to actually understand that it is not done on purpose. It is just a message that carries meanings that you might disagree with.


Why izzit that life can be so complicated at times?